As I reflect on all that has happened in this past week, I can't help but remember a quote from the Lord of the Rings trilogy.
"I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us."
Don't worry, I don't have a perfect memory; I had to look up the quote. I am not quite sure what part of the story it is from, either, but I still think this quote is perfect for what is happening. None of us wanted all the complications that have arisen because of the coronavirus. However, I believe this can be a time of great spiritual growth.
A week ago, I was getting ready to go home to Iowa to visit my family over Spring Break. Last Thursday was the first day that I thought that the coronavirus might be serious. That day, our principal heard word that we needed to start thinking about what to do if school could not reconvene. It was a possibility, a just-in-case scenario. But it made me wonder if I should change my travel plans. I called my mom, but she didn't seem too worried, so I left for Iowa the next day.
Life was normal over the weekend with the exception of increased awareness and more hand washing while out in public. We attended Saturday evening mass as usual without holy water or the sign of peace. On Sunday, we went to the outlet mall and had a deliciously spicy Thai meal.
By Monday, we were starting to realize what a big deal it actually was. We went to noon mass and asked Father to stay for confession. My mom is a smart woman; she knew we should take advantage of the sacraments while we could. That was the last public mass we could attend in the Diocese of Sioux City.
That day the governor of Iowa asked schools to close for a month, restaurants to serve carry-out or drive-through only, and for stores to stop collecting refundable bottles and cans. (We know because we tried and were told they weren't collecting anymore. Whoops!)
By Tuesday, I learned that Kansas had called for schools to be closed and for continuing learning to be implemented by March 30. We aren't quite sure exactly what that will look like at this point, but it will most likely entail a lot project based learning and online learning.
My mind is a continuous swirl of questions. What online platforms can I use? How do I make sure that not all of the work requires a computer? Will my students be able to come and get their textbooks? (They left before we had heard even a whisper that we might be out of the classroom indefinitely.) Can I provide a chance for students to come and check out classroom library books? Can all of my students access reading books, either electronically or physically? Will all of my students be able to learn electronically? How will my students with IEPs cope?
And those are just the imminent questions. (Luckily I am more of a day-to-day planner; otherwise, I might be completely overwhelmed.) I also have larger questions that I know it is too soon to answer. How will the coronavirus affect my discernment weekend with the Salesians? Will it be postponed or canceled? Will I even be able to leave the country in the fall and go on mission?
At this time, I am not anxious about my plans to do mission work. If it is meant to be, I will go. If I can't go, I will find a temporary job and leave when I can. I just find it ironic (and yes, this is actually irony) that I have had people ask me if I am worried about getting sick while on mission, and now it seems like my chances of getting sick are just as likely--if not higher--right here in the United States.
I want to use this time of social distancing to focus on creating good habits. I want to incorporate prayer time, crafting time, work time, exercise, and reading time into my daily schedule. Most of all, I want to keep my life balanced and grounded in these uncertain times, especially since I will not be able to attend mass. Please keep me in your prayers as I will keep all of you in mine.